Spiringly free 6/30

You know that rabbit hole, the one where something happens. It’s not what you’d thought it was, and you think it’s one thing. And it’s unfair, unjust. Or you’re a not good enough, that why he didn’t answer.

I was chatting with a new person met on a dating app. In the morning we talked about meeting tonight. He mentioned he would check when he’d be free and no reply. The day past, I choose to hang at home, flat hunt, learn and chill.

Past me - would have questioned her self worth. What did I say? Or didn’t say? How did I sound? …

This is but one example of the way that I am today.

When “unwanted” behaviour happen around me, it’s slides off me. 

I could have an emotion that come up, I feel it and then choose to act aligned to my values.

I don’t go down the spiral anymore. 

FREE!!!!

Someone shared an observation of me, that I gave the apearance of being in control of my emotions, that I didn’t let them run my life. The later is true. the first no.

You can’t control your emotions. Your body will feel them, and you will be influenced by them, however hard you choose to push them away.

What I do IS FEEL ALL OF MY EMOTIONS FULLY. 

I also cry in public when tears come up. 

And by feeling them, they don’t take me over.

It’s not about control, it’s about surrender.

That’s where the freedom lives.

From my wild heart to yours

Tara 

6/30